Jojo's Bizarre Adventure

Episode 1:   Iggy Of 'The Fool' & Nidul Of 'The God Geb.'

        Series opens with a virgin sacrifice.   Joy.   More like JoJo's Bloody Adventure.   Oh good- blood's done now.
        A dog.   Okay.   At least it's not a Furby or some other bundle of barf-inducing cuteness.
        Helicopter guy.   Canteen.   Head.   Yuck.
        That's odd- the water creature couldn't penetrate the metal of the truck but could penetrate the metal of the gas / water can.

Episode 2:   ?

        The diffuculty, aside from the not-always-consistent points at which the episodes start and stop, is the tapes I saw list two different titles for each episode.   There doesn't really appear to be an opening with each episode.   I realize this is done to save time and tape space, but it's a little more difficult for me to do my thing this way.
        Of course, if they hadn't started the truck to run off in, if they'd just dealt with the water thing by the wrecked helicopter, they wouldn't have a broken truck now.
        The guy needed the dog to tell him the sand flying up into the air is where the water thing is attacking from?
        "The wound is slight- it's not anything fatal."   Oh yeah?   Blood was spurting several feet from the guy's neck.   Slight, indeed.
        "All we can do now is leave the fight to Jutaro."   It's not like they could, oh, try to help?   Make some noise, anything?   Some friends.
        And that is a seriously gross dog.
        Okay- the engine / radiator exploded but the truck's fine now.

Episode 3:   Darby The Gambler, Osiris- God Of The Underworld.

        Gambler guy.   They can't kill him because if the (the good guys) do, the trapped guys soul dies.   So why don't they torture the gambler or convince him in some other way- other than betting another soul- to give the trapped guy's soul back?
        "Kill me and two souls perish!"   So don't kill him already.   Jeez.
        I consider myself agnostic for the most part, but one thing I don't think i'd ever do is bet my soul on something.   That tiny tiny bit of faith I have floating around seems to tell me it's a bad idea.

Episode 4:   Dio's World, The Evil Void- Vanilla Ice.

        I see- the sacrifice and the blood and all that are part of the opening credits.   Yuck, I say.  Double yuck since it doesn't have anything to do with the story.   I guess that's supposed to be Dio with the bone things coming out of his face, but the whole virgin sacrifice schtick doesn't do anything to advance the story- it's gratuitous.
        Poof, they're at Dio's place.   Did I miss an episode?
        "Incredible- she's not physically concious."   I understand that it's part of the story telling schtick, but there isn't any external logic explaining why she can do this.   It's an unjustified plot device- like the 'cosmic cloud' they encounter in every third episode of the original Star Trek.   No, that's not a good analogy- the cosmic cloud, however poorly explained, did have the purpose of advancing or starting the story whereas this girl and the whole hospital thing doesn't actually contribute to the story.
        No, that is not Vanilla Ice.   Cooler than the Vanilla Ice we've endured all these years.   But then, what wouldn't be?

Episode 5:   Dio's World- Kakyoin's Hierophant Barrier.

        Not that it's cool to see people being hit and blood and stuff, but it's nice to see a scene where a car driving through an area crowded with pedestrians doesn't miss every single person.
        Awww.   Mr. Joestar stabbed in the throat.   So why isn't this wound 'slight and nothing fatal?'
        I miss Iggy.

Episode 6:   Dio's World- Farewell My Friends

        Finally they hit the bad guy, but then give him a minute or two to recuperate.   Why doesn't anyone in these shows ever keep at the other person until they're sure the other guy is really dead?
        So the bad guy 'refuels' his blood from Mr. Joestar's (apparent) corpse.   Suppose- just for a moment- that an anime character wasn't conveniently stupid.   Kakyoin knows only the head is Dio's and that the goal is to crush Dio's head.   Kakyoin gets in a good attack on Dio- multiple hits without Dio hitting back.   But Kakyoin hits Dio all over the place- from his knees to his head (Dio's).   Had Kakyoin had more than three neurons firing at the same time, he would have focused his attack on Dio's head.   Dio wouldn't or at least might not have been able to reach Mr. Joestar's (apparent) corpse.   This was a story telling element worthy of Flame Of Recca.
        Soooo...Kakyoin finally makes the bad guy's head explode by punching him in the knee.   That's it?   Almost the dumbest thing in all six episodes accept...
        The sick girl wakes up from her coma for no apparent reason other than it's the end of the show.   Gosh, i'm so glad she survived.   Not.   Sick girl who we know from the get-go will eventually wake up and be okay.   Whoopy flipping do.