Chichiri Fushigi Yugi Chichiri

Episode 1:   Girl Of Legend.

        (and stop referring to yourself as 'boy of destiny...')
        Miyaka.   Oh, this is the bottomless pit girl- eat, eat, eat.   The educational system is different in Japan than it is in the U.S..   In Japan, getting into a good high school is at least as important as getting into a good college is here.
        The show works kind of like Never-Ending Story.   While someone in our world reads the book, that stuff happens to the people inside the story (though to the reader as well).
        Definitely Shojo.   Lots of guys with lots of slow motion highlights of smiles, twinkling eyes, flowing (guy's) hair.   Don't worry- it's not just that; nearly everyone is completely nuts.   Basically it's an anime soap opera.
        Miyaka defeats four bad guys at once with complete confidence and assurance.   Then, when they get back up, she's instantly totally scared and helpless, so ogre-boy can save her.   A bit like Maid Maryan in the Kevin Costner version of Robin Hood.

Episode 2:   Priestess Of Suzaku.

        Most unfortunately Miyaka cries in order to get ogre-boy to do what she wants.   Tamahome.   Okay, that's ogre-boy.   Hotohori, emperor.   Good grief, they have sparkles all around him.
        The Konan Empire...shouldn't that be Aquilonia....?
        Miyaka Yugi, the savior of our empire.   Isn't that a bit like relying on Groo for security?

Episode 3:   Seven Stars Of Suzaku.

        Emperor:   "I'm so beautiful, it scares me."   There hasn't been this much love in the room since Narcissus discovered himself...
        Noriko kisses Tamahome.   Yuck; the reasons for which will become aparent later.

Episode 4:   Missing Love.

        "Explain to us, sire, why you ignore all the women in your harem?"
                  "Because I am more beautiful than all of them."
        Noriko is angry with Miyaka because the Emperor's going nuts over Miyaka and ignoring Noriko even though she (Noriko) has been in the imperial harem for a year.   Noriko is angry with Miyaka not for what Miyaka has done, but for what Noriko has failed to do.

Episode 5:   Bewildered Heartbeat.

        Noriko's secret revealed.   It's a man, bay-bee.

Episode 6:   Even If I Die.

        Emperor:   "I don't believe it- there's another man alive who's almost as beautiful as I am."

Episode 7:   Going Home

        Emperor:   "I can't stand the sight of anything so ugly."
                  BONK!
        Girl:   "I can cure you as well."
                  Noriko:   "Don't you worry about me little girl, i'm not even injured."
        Girl:   "I'll fix your perversion."
                  BONK!
        The guard locks the door.   Miyaka shouldn't be able to open it.
        Miyaka's back in present-day Japan; Yui's missing.   Never seems to occur to Miyaka where the most logical place for Yui to be is.

Episode 8:   ?

        Miyaka's brother:   "...he demands a sacrifice..It is scary!!!"
        Yui went into the book.   Miyaka eventually goes back in.   Miyaka's brother is the reader now.
        Two hours pass in present-day Japan, while three months passed in the Konan Empire.   I have a problem with this- it seems like what we will soon find out happened to Yui would have been mentioned in the book in present-day Japan.   Unless the story in that book skips to the exact moment of Miyaka's return, so much time shouldn't have passed in the Konan Empire since no one has been reading the book.
        Aaaand another thing-   The Priestess of Suzaku is supposed to be this big important protector of the realm, but we'll just let her run all over the place, with a war approaching without any guards, escort, etc..   Yeah, I know, it's the 'Captain Kirk beams down all alone to a dangerous planet' thing, and the story wouldn't work if it wasn't this way, but still...

Episode 9:   Enemies Unseen.

        Chi-chiri is monk-boy, got it.   Miyaka realizes Yui must be the Priestess of Seiryu.

Episode 10:   Looking For You.

        Miyaka:   "Wait...playing dead only works with bears and boring boys."   Unless they have a hand-cart... (go buy yourself a donut as a reward if you got that reference)
        Miyaka and Yui reunited at the Kuto palace.

Episode 11:   Priestess of Seiryu.

        Kuto general is Nakago.
        Judging from the way the guards check the room Miyaka & Yui are hiding in, Groo aparently is in charge of Kuto security.
        Miyaka:   "If I don't have the scroll, i'll never find the other three warriors."   Nobody ever thought to, oh, say, copy the blasted thing.
        Yui:   "At last I can go back to Konan with Miyaka and be closer to Tamahome."   Is Yui stupid or does she have selective amnesia or what?   Yui was the one reading the book in present-day Japan before she and Miyaka switched- why is she suddenly completely unaware of the relationship between Miyaka and Tamahome?   Or, let's say she is aware.   Then what right has she to later accuse Miyaka of not being a good best friend?
        Chi-chiri:   "Oh, shut!"
        Tamahome:   "That's a pun, right?"
        Hinge point- stupid one- but a major hinge point for the story nonetheless:   Yui sees Miyaka and Tamahome kiss and overhears Miyaka saying to Tamahome "That's the whole reason I came back from my world- I couldn't forget about you; I knew no matter what I had to be with you."   Yui hates Miyaka now in a big way.   Blames Miyaka for leaving her there, for the bad things that happened to her (Yui) and for the fact that Miyaka has Tamahome instead of Yui.
        Yui:   "You tricked me, didn't you?   You didn't come back here for me- it was only your desire for Tamahome that made you return."   Everything else aside, the main thing Yui seems to be basing her anger at Miyaka on is the belief that Miyaka lied about why she came back.
        Myself:   "What the HELL is this???!"   Forget the fact that Miyaka did finally come back, forget the fact that she and Yui have been friends forever, forget the fact that Miyaka was genuinely happy to see Yui, and forget the fact that Miyaka was in no way responsible for Yui wandering into a bad part of town on her arrival.   'To hell with that- i'll just blame Miyaka for everything.'
        This is the same sort of thing I was talking about with Noriko back in episode 4- Yui is holding Miyaka responsible not because of what Miyaka did but because of what happened to Yui.   Yes, I know how very very bad what happened to Yui turns out to be, but this still doesn't change the fact that it was in no way Miyaka's fault.
        Another thought as I continue to over-analyze this:   The logic Yui is using appears to be similar to the logic the poor tend to use to blame the wealthy and powerful for the poor's position in life- it's your fault i'm this way (poor) because you're that way (rich and powerful); to heck with my responsibility for my choices and my life- it's all your fault because you've been more fortunate/done better.   Aaaanyway, back to the show...
        Nakago is a seriously manipulative s.o.b..   You just watch though- I bet he'll end up being a 'good guy' because he's another cute guy.   I still don't hate him as much as Kyle though (Minmei's cousin for Robotech).
        Oh...hey...Chi-chiri's eyes can open.
        Grrr...last scene is Yui looking at her scar and presumably blaming Miyaka for it.   Hello, Yui- who put the blade in your hand?   Who's fault does that make it?

Episode 12:   Only You.

        We find out what happened to Yui when she first arrived three months ago.   Yui wanders into the slum district of Kuto's capital.   Who's fault?- Yui's.   At the very least, it's certainly not Miyaka's fault.   A gang of thugs rape her in the alley.   While the show doesn't show any naughty bits, there is absolutely no question that this is what happened to Yui.   Certainly not Yui's fault, but it's not Miyaka's fault either.
        And while we're on the subject of things that aren't Miyaka's fault, let's consider the three month thing.   Assuming (don't tell me, it's an old pun and I already know it) Yui realizes that she has arrived in a different place than before (first episode), doesn't it occur to her that she and Miyaka might have arrived at two very distant points?
        Ah, we also find out that the scar on Yui's wrist is from her attempting suicide because of the rape.
        Yui:   " For three months I waited for Miyaka to come back to this world, and when she finally did, it wasn't even for me."   I don't give a rip that she's here, that she found me, or that she's happy to see me.   And Miyaka's not being a good best friend?
        Yui:   "I'm going to make sure your hopes and dreams are as dead as mine."   That's right, everyone should be as miserable as you.   No, in case you're wondering, I wouldn't be a very good rape crisis counsellor.

Episode 13:   For The Sake Of Love.

        Chi-chiri switches with Hotohori so Hotohori can go help Miyaka.   Ah yes, Miyaka's better off with Hotohori than she is with Chi-chiri who can phase in and out wherever he wants and blast stuff and freeze people...   Boy, some emperor he is, if he places his desire to be with Miyaka over her safety or if he's too stupid to realize that Chi-chiri is more powerful than he is.
        Cross-dressing schtick in this episode.   All the thugs are conveniently unaware of Hotohori's voice.
        Yeah, yeah, bandit sub-plot that'll obviously end up with the fifth Suzaku person.

Episode 14:   Wolf In The Fortress.

        More messing around with the bandits.   Yay.

Episode 15:   City Of Resurrection.

        Zombie village sub-plot.   Genro's the fifth Suzaku.

Episode 16:   Battle Of Sorrow.

        More zombies.   Yay.   Nakago tortures Tamahome.   Yay.   Mitzkakei, demon-girl's ex, is sixth Suzaku.

Episode 17:   Magic Flute.

        Looking back at episodes thirteen through sixteen, they could have accomplished all of the core plot developments without the sub-plots in a single episode.   Assuming the series runs twenty-six episodes, were the last four episodes and their sub-plots mainly present to stretch the series to the necessary length?   I've just been told the series runs 52 episodes.   Good grief.   Nothing stretches a show out like stupid people doing stupid things.   Yes, yes, I know we wouldn't have a show to begin with if they all had some common sense.
        Child:   "Are you my big brother's wife?"
                  Hotohori:   "No, I am a man."
                  Child:   "But you are so beautiful."
                  Hotohori:   "Even though they're poor, they're so bright and honest."
        More stuff in Tamahome's home village.   End of tape cuts this episode off before the end.   Well, shoot.   Even though most of the people and what goes on in this series are really stupid, I still want to see the remaining episodes.   I can't stand unfinished stories.